Am I There, Yet?

That’s a question I get sometimes from people who aren’t stay at home parents.  The truth is that I don’t really know.  I can get to the end of my day and I can’t figure out how I got there.  So…today I had an epiphany.  I decided to document my day to find out the answer.  The following is the results of my experiment.  Here it goes…

7:30 – L comes into my room and wakes me up by saying, “T is moving the chair into the kitchen!”  I say, “Why is he doing that?”  “I don’t know.”  “O.K.  I’m coming.  Come and give me a hug first.”  She comes and gives me a hug and then says, “Mom, you need to brush your teeth.”

By 8:00 I had fixed the kids scrambled eggs and I was making oatmeal and slicing strawberries for my breakfast.  During that time the kids asked for hot chocolate so I made hot chocolate (with their help) and cleaned up their egg mess.  I almost sprinkled chili powder in my oatmeal instead of cinnamon.  I was pretty distracted.  My oatmeal was cold by the time I ate it, but the strawberries were excellent.

8:30 – I planned on putting a chicken into the slow cooker for dinner.  I got the bird out of the refrigerator and it was still frozen.  I took it out of the freezer on Monday!  I thought I’d try it anyways, got out the recipe and noticed that I was supposed to marinade it for 24 hours.  So, I prepared the marinade, poured it over the bird and put it all back in the fridge.  I’ll figure out what to make dinner later.  I sat down to enjoy some coffee and update my grocery list.  I called A and invited her over for coffee tomorrow.  Meanwhile, L was showing T her favorite computer game so things were pretty peaceful.

9:00 – T got a bit antsy and hit L.  So much for the peacefulness.  After his timeout, I put both kids in the tub for bath time.  I became ambitious and thought I’d try to clean the bathroom while the kids played in the bath.  I collected the supplies I needed.  But, between washing hair and bodies and collecting clean clothes and monitoring T with his cup (he loves to pour water out of the tub) no cleaning happened.  I pulled them out of the tub.  T wanted to brush his teeth.  I grabbed his toothbrush and remembered that he had used it to “clean” the carpet in his bedroom last night.  I boiled some water, picked out all the hair and fuzz out of the toothbrush and boiled the head for three minutes.  During that time T found my coffee and decided to drink it.  I finally got him into the bathroom to brush his teeth.  I came out and got L dressed and brushed her hair.  I went in to check on T and he had discovered the toothpaste and soap and it was everywhere, including his toothbrush and his clean clothes I had just put on him.  I threw away his toothbrush and made a note to buy another one before tonight.  I went out to the kitchen where L was finishing up her hot chocolate and she had spilled it all down the front of her clean shirt I had just put on her.  By this time it was 9:50.  I planned on having the kids clean and happy by 9:30 so I could put them in front of the TV to watch the last half of
Sesame Street so I could sneak away for a shower.  Only 10 minutes left of Sesame Street.  I turned it on anyway, gave the kids some fruit snacks and left them under the watchful eye of Elmo while I took a quick shower.  No time to shave my legs today.  (Sorry, J!) 

10:00 – I was only interrupted once during my shower and it was L letting me know my phone was ringing.  I think that’s a new record.  I got out of the shower and opened the door.  I was greeted by a very unpleasant smell.  I threw some clothes on and changed T’s diaper with my hair dripping down my back.  He was in that diaper a total of 20 minutes.  Then I changed both of the kids’ shirts.  When I took the diaper outside I saw that T had gotten all the magnets off the refrigerator.  I managed to tiptoe through them and picked them up while I checked my phone message.  It was our builder.  The painter was at the house and wanted me to pick out the trim color.  Could I swing by the house to verify the color?  I looked at the time.  How could it be 10:20?  *sigh*  Back to the bathroom where I blow-dried my hair,  plucked my eyebrows and threw on some lip-gloss and mascara.  Only the high priority items today.  I did not want to look like a stay at home mom while I ran errands.  But, I threw my hair into a ponytail, in spite of my good intentions.  I made a mental note to make a hair appointment for this weekend.

I told L we had to go by the house and then make a stop at Home Depot.  “Mom!  I thought we weren’t going anywhere today.”  “Sorry, honey.  Some things came up.”  “Home Depot smells.”  I got the kids all bundled up and right when we were walking out the door my phone rang.  It was J wanting some inspiration on decorating the auditorium for the Easter services this weekend.  “Doesn’t K normally do that?  Oh right, she’s left the church.”  I told him I’d brainstorm and get back to him.  I took one last look at the mess in the house and sighed at the sight of breakfast dishes still in the sink.  Those would have to wait until later.  I managed to get the kids out of the door by 11:00, but T took his time getting into the car because he wanted to play in the snow.

11:00 – I got to the house, talked with the painter, got back in the car and drove to Home Depot.  I scored a race car cart for the kids upon arrival.  They were pretty excited about that.  I spent longer than expected at Home Depot talking to the sales rep about blinds.  T kept asking me for candy.  He must have asked me 25 times, at least.  “T, I don’t have candy.  I can’t give you what I don’t have.”  “But, I’ve been a big boy.”  “I don’t have candy!”  They were both pretty grumpy by the time we got to the car.  It was past their normal lunch time so I made a detour to Burger King.  I didn’t get home until 1:00.

1:00 – I got the kids inside and set up with their kids meals.  I turned off the coffee pot (oops!) and I ran back out to the car to empty it of the trash that was piling up in there.  I came back in and started a load of laundry.  During laundry time I was interrupted three times.  #1 time…T spilled his milk.  #2 time…”Mom!  What do robots eat?”  #3 time…”Mom!  T’s eating my French fries!”  I snacked on the kid’s meals and picked up fruit snacks and cereal off the floor and vacuumed the front room and hallway.  This time I only had two interruptions.  #1…”Mom!  T got applesauce on my sock!”  “Then take your sock off and put it in the dirty clothes pile.”  I later found that sock on the kitchen counter.  #2…”Mom!  T’s dipping his snake in the applesauce!”  Sure enough, T was dipping his toy snake into his applesauce and “painting” my chairs with it.  I stopped vacuuming and cleaned up that mess.  While I was doing that, T managed to smash his finger in the door of the closet.  After a round of “boo-boo kisses” I managed to finish the vacuuming and spray the kids’ floor down with Febreze (allergen reducer, of course, no thanks to the previous tenants and their pets).

1:30 – I checked my email and spent about 10 minutes on the net.  The kids wanted to watch some TV so I turned on 64 Zoo Lane.  T couldn’t watch it unless I cuddled with him so I held him for 20 minutes while we watched the show.  Actually they watched the snow.  I gazed out at the falling snow and was trying to remember if it was spring, yet.

2:00 – I started another load of laundry and played a couple games of Candyland with L.  She kicked my butt in that game.  She won her first game before I even got to Gumdrop Lane.  After that, we all spent some time coloring together.

2:30 – I changed T’s diaper, again, and put him down for his nap.  L wanted to play her computer game so I took advantage of the quiet to read my Bible, meditate and pray.

3:00 – I put L in my room for some quiet time and I turned on Dr. Phil with the intent of folding the clean clothes while I watched some TV.  The phone rang and it was a friend of mine that I hadn’t heard from for a long time.  We caught up for 45 minutes.  So much for getting any work done.

3:45 – J came home.  He came home early because he needed to work tonight.  We talked.  I sorted through mail.  He helped L with a computer game.

4:30 – I left to go back to the house with the blinds and paint samples.  I had a tough time making a decision so I called Mom and asked her to come over and help me.  I think we made some pretty good decisions.

5:30 – I got home.  J had cleaned the breakfast and lunch dishes out of the sink and fed L.  T was still asleep.  J went back to work and I woke T up.  I fixed T and I some macaroni and cheese for dinner.

I’ve spent the past couple of hours messing around with the kids and the computer.

So what did I do all day?  Not a whole lot of much.  I’m looking around the house and it looks just like it did when I woke up.  This morning I swore I’d get up by 6:30 to get some things done before the kids woke up, but that just didn’t happen.  I guess I’ll start on that tomorrow.

How do stay at home moms do it?  I walk into some of my friends’ homes and they are immaculate all the time.  I don’t get it.  Maybe I don’t make cleaning my house a priority.  My high school English teacher always told us that we will always find time to do the things that are important to us.  I always find time for quiet time with God, a shower and play time with the kids.  I know that those things are good for us.  But, where do I find time to exercise and clean my house?  I’ll try again tomorrow.  I will get up early.  Maybe someday I’ll receive the SuperMom award.  Yeah right, I’ll get it all together right when the kids enter college.  For now, I am being challenged to another round of Candyland.