Am I There, Yet?

We have a new psycho neighbor.  He’s about 2 feet tall, black and very loud.  I’d have to say he’s the most annoying neighbor I’ve ever had.  This stupid crow has been hanging around and harassing our neighbors since Saturday.  He starts squawking early in the morning to wake us all up.  Yesterday he flew towards a friend of mine who was coming to visit and almost landed on her head.  He’s been collecting toys from our neighbor’s yard and putting them on the roof of another neighbor.  He walked into the house (through the doggie door) of another neighbor and started to harass her cats.  He found his way into another house and started to eat the cereal off their table.  My daughter was playing on the back porch last night when he came and hung out on the fence staring at her.  She got a little freaked out and came inside.  I saw him on our neighbor’s fence last night tapping on the door with his beak and peering inside their windows.  Our neighbor told us that he took all of his BBQ utensils and threw them on the ground.  They also told us that they named him “nevermore.”

My theory is that some “good Samaritan” somewhere decided to “rescue” this bird and domesticated him.  He probably got too out of control so they decided to “free” him into the wild.  The stupid bird now relies on human interaction and probably won’t survive in the wild.  If Keiko (Free Willy star) couldn’t survive in the ocean without human interaction, why would this bird all of a sudden go from a domestic home life to wild living without a problem?

We don’t know what to do with this bird.  One neighbor called animal control and was on hold for too long and eventually hung up.  We may be stuck with this pesky neighbor until somebody comes up with a plan.  I just don’t want him attacking my kids (he’s about as tall as my 2 year-old) or spreading a disease.

Keep wild animals in the wild, people!!!