Balance
I crave balance in my life. Balance (to me) is physical, spiritual and emotional health. It’s all related. When chaos reigns in the home, I feel unbalanced.
A couple of weeks ago Josh was sitting on the couch with our son and all of a sudden said, “I have a fever.” I said, “Seriously?” I don’t know why thought he’d be joking. Maybe I just didn’t want to believe him. He really did have a fever and after 36 hours of it not going down, he went to the doctor only to find out he had influenza. He came back home and stayed in bed for 5 full days.
I rallied my “troops” and many people prayed for us. As a stay-at-home mom, I can’t afford to get that sick. Who would take care of me and the kids while I’m in bed? Thank God my children both had their flu shots.
I felt unbalanced.
I felt like a single mom trying to take care of three children and keep balance in my home. I don’t know how single moms do it.
I was vigilant in my fight against the flu. I downed Airborne like a junkie. I washed our sheets, blankets and pillow cases every day. I Clorox wiped everything Josh touched. I took extra vitamins and ate my fruits and veggies.
The first day Josh was feeling like he could function, he went downstairs and made a pot of coffee and woke me up with a fresh cup of coffee. That was the first time I felt like I could breath again in over a week. Things were back to normal. I felt balanced again.
During the time that Josh was sick, it felt as if the rest of my world was unbalanced. I didn’t get physically sick, but my emotional health was out of balance. I was stressed out about Josh’s health. I had to work extra hard to keep things under control in the house. I also felt out of balance spiritually. My spiritual life consisted of “popcorn” prayers…short little bursts of prayers haphazardly thrown up in the air. “God, please heal Josh.” “Jesus, give me the strength to take care of my family.” “Please don’t let me get sick.”
Life is constantly changing and requires constant adjustment. Trying to achieve balance during every situation can be tricky. I find that it’s easy for me to have a rhythm when life is “normal.” I can have scheduled quiet times, meals for my family, appointments, etc… But, when I get out of my zone…say we take a vacation…I find that I don’t necessarily make certain things a priority…namely my quiet time with God.
Josh is out of town this week and my life is slightly out of balance again. But, I’m learning to recognize the times when I need to keep balance in the midst of making adjustments. You’d think I would have this mastered by now…maybe it’s a battle I’ll continue to face my entire life. Maybe God’s trying to teach me something through constant change when all I desire is structure and a sense of normalcy.
Many of my friends are going through difficult life circumstances that could easily throw them off balance. My prayer is that they’ll be able to continue resting in God in the midst of their storms of uncertainty.
Good post!